An open letter to @whitneyway






Dear Ms. Thore:

Yesterday, I had the opportunity to watch your show, My Big Fat Fabulous Life, on TLC.  And only after about half an episode on the TLC marathon, I grew concerned for you.

Before I go on, I should mention that I know 4 women who suffer from PCOS. Those women are myself and 3 other friends of mine.  All of us struggle with our weight and all of us will continue to do so for the rest of our lives.  As for my diagnosis, I was diagnosed when I was 30 years old (I am now 36) after a ovarian cyst burst during Christmas of 2009.  I was rushed to emergency due to low blood pressure during the early morning hours of December 26 (I fainted and was as white as a sheet).

Subsequently I was put on birth control due to my heavy and painful periods that I had had for the previous 10+ years.  And it has made a huge difference in my life.

I also suffer from depression and anxiety and can understand eating a whole pizza in the dark because I am upset about something and not in control of something or other.  I understand where you are coming from.

But what I don't understand is why you continually feed yourself the way you are doing at present.  I get that being overweight sucks.  I am overweight myself and have been for the past 10 years (I am 5'8" and weigh about 272). As a result this past January, I was diagnosed as pre-diabetic.  Now I do realize that part of it is that I have a family history of diabetes and that plays into it, but I can see you ending up with diabetes along with other health issues.

The reason that I ended up with a pre-diabetes diagnosis is because I ate in much the same manner that you are eating.  I love much the same things that you do and sadly it has the same effect on me that it does on you.  I love it so much that I would spend many an hour stuffing my mouth with candy, fast food, and sugary drinks to make sure I felt happy and oblivious to what I was actually feeling.  I still love that food, but I have find other things that can give me that sort of satisfaction, but doesn't give me the cravings that fast food and sugary drinks and food give me.  And yes that means denying myself a dessert or sugary drink when out with friends.  But sometimes I fail and overindulge on those foods and pay for it the next day when my numbers go up on the scale.

I think you have a wonderful personality and yes, people should accept those who are heavier and not stick thin, which is equally unhealthy.  But you seem to not realize that you are slowly killing yourself by not realizing the harm you are doing to your body by feeding yourself the food you are eating.  Being morbidly obese is equally unhealthy as being stick thin and I can understand that fear of  being that thin.  But you don't need to do this to yourself.  

I can only imagine how great a dancer you would be if you lost a good portion of your current weight.  You need to realize that what you are doing is harming yourself as much as somebody who is depriving themselves of food.  And its not only yourself that you are harming, it is your friends and family.   You can still be an advocate for those that are struggling with their weight at a lower weight because you know what its like to be overweight and you know how people view those who are overweight.  You have a great opportunity to be an advocate for those who need help with their weight and feel slighted by their weight.

I also know what its like to have a parent that wants you to outlive them and not have you have a chronic problem or be dead before they pass away.  You need to treat yourself better and get back down to a healthy weight and honestly I think that you'll feel a lot better about yourself and you'll stop making excuses as a result.

I hope that you take this letter into consideration and understand that this is from somebody who is concerned about your overall health.

Sincerely,

Melissa Wiebe  

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